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I'm over being an adult.

This might be a 'too much info' type entry, but since I got nobody to really vent to, Livejournal is all I got.

First and formost, I am overly emotional, and perhaps weaker then I normally am. I have been on a heavy period for over 3 weeks and I am seriously going crazy.
See a doc right? Well I don't have one.
Worse, I don't have time to see one.
I work two jobs. Do you think I am going too miss work, and not get $500? When I am like 2 months away. No fucking way. I'll die trying. I'm way to stubborn.

XM sent me to collections, and THEY are in the fault. So now I need to wait for them to give me my money back, and then I have to write a letter to the two companies that deal with your credit and get that off my credit rating. I fucking paid those fuckers. Makes me SOOO mad. I cancelled my subscription. FUCK THEM. I am so livid.

I got in a fight with my cousin Kim. I hate it! But sorry, she is being selfish, and she lies and I am not going to fall for her shit. I call you out. I don't care if your bitch, a diva.. whatever the fuck u wanna be. Just owe up to it. I cannot stand being fake and lying. And you I'm overly protective of my family, and if I think your doing them wrong, I will confront you. Sorry. I love the girl to pieces, but owe up to your actions and things you've done wrong. We're human and not perfect, but the first step is admitting it. And I've conforted Melissa and Kimmy, and I keep it real. And now we're good. I hope she get over it.

ANd I am tired. Two jobs is tiring. Retail is a bitch. It rapes you up the ass, with no damn lube. I am quitting Winners or only working once a week after X-mas. If Eric would ever give me my APA, i might know my damn raise at MAP. But those cheap asses, I'm not expecting much.

I feel bad for the cats, I'm never home. I never get to clean the homestead like i want to.
I feel very a lone.
ANd I greatly appricate how much Amy doesn't keep her word on calling me.
ANd I miss my dad and brothers like crazy. Its a little sick, but I do.

I thank gawd for my sister and my grandma, or I might of jumped off a bridge.
WHen I first moved, and up till about 2 months ago, I was soo happy.
So whats happened?
I feel alone, I don't have a real friend here, and some guy showed his penis at my window........ would of been more hilarious if my 12 year old cousin wasn't here and I was trying to hide the penis from her sight. (Which I did... THANK GOD!)

I'm done bitching. I hate being a downer. I needed to vent. I'll go to bed.
Tomorrow is a new day.


I want to run away to California, and have a Hills/Laguna Beach LIfe........................................

Comments

I don't know if this'll help any, but you can email Michelle and ask for pre-planned vto if you have a dr appt or whatever ... that doesn't count against your $500 ... I did that on monday, got the morning off because I was coming back from Saskatoon. Barb's done it for a dr's appt too for 2 hrs ... worth a try ...

sorry you're having such a rough time :(

January 2009

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